I am a worrier. I worry about everything.
When I was pregnant with Jake, I worried that I had gestational diabetes (which I did not). I worried because I continued to measure small throughout my entire pregnancy, and no one seemed to know why. I worried that my baby would have Down syndrome (we had no idea that he actually did).
When I found out that Jake was in fact diagnosed with Down syndrome, it was as though the floodgates opened to worry on a whole new level.
Now I worry about all of the possible physical issues associated with Down syndrome: sight, hearing, heart issues, stomach issues, leukemia, thyroid problems, and the list goes on. And not only that, but I also worry about developmental issues: gross motor skills, fine motor skills, communication, learning, and so on.
This guy (Cole) definitely takes after me; he often looks worried as well!
Today it snowed. A lot.
Despite the snow, we bundled everyone in the car and went to PREP, and Jake was the only kid in his class! So Jake got some great one-on-one time, and I got some time to chat with some of the staff there.
I told them that no matter what else is going on in life, no matter the joys, the struggles, the stresses, or the celebrations, there is always the nagging feeling in the back of my mind: I am worried.
I am worried that I am not doing enough for Jake. I am worried that I am missing some important aspect of his development that I should be working on. I am worried that I am not pushing him enough. I am worried that he might not be at the same level as other kids with Ds who are around his age. I am worried that I am not a very good teacher for him.
You know what his teacher said to me?
“Karyn, don’t worry. Just keep doing what you’re doing. Jake is doing great.”
Every once in a while, we all need to be reminded of that.
Just keep doing what you’re doing.